Act# 17: Save your five bucks.
This week GQ (Gentlemen's Quarterly), a popular monthly magazine devoted to "men's fashion, style and culture" released its Top 100 Hottest Women of the Century list. Goodness, I'm blushing. With such creative and imaginative categories like "hottest Chinese chick" and "hottest pregnant Sri-Lankan", how could I not? While I personally am flattered that GQ readers are eager to commend my sisters who are "capable of giving a sensation of heat or of burning, searing, or scalding" (Meriam-Webster), I wanted to offer some alternative top 100 lists for your future considerations. So here is my "Top 10 list of alternatives to GQ's top 100 lists". That was a mouthful!
1. Top 100 Most Influential Women of the Century. OK, so I admit, GQ readers might find this a little less titillating so I'll do better.
2. Top 100 Working Mothers Who Don't Have Bags Under Their Eyes. Clearly, I wouldn't qualify.
3. Top 100 Female Social Entrepreneurs (If a woman who can run a business AND has a social conscience doesn't turn you on, I don't know what does!)
4. Top 100 Women World Leaders. Please don't put them in bikinis, GQ.
5. Top 100 Stay-At-Home Mothers Who Have Temporarily Put Their Advanced College Degrees In a Drawer to Raise Your Kids
6. Top 100 Women Local Community Organizers
7. Top 100 Retired Women Who Changed the World But Who We've Now Heavily Medicated and Placed in Nursing Homes. Hey, you can't blame me for having a thing for wisdom.
And gosh, all this praise for us is making me blush again, GQ! Don't you ever want to honor your own? I certainly do! So here are a few categories for you.
8. Top 100 Working Fathers. And no, that doesn't just include outside the home.
9. Top 100 Men Who Speak Out Against Violence Against Women
10. Top 100 Men Who Would Rather Spend 5 Bucks on a Donation to the Local
Food Bank than on this Particular Issue of GQ. I think I'm gonna need a cold shower after that one.
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